Voices Carry

Monday brought another parenting and medical staff meeting. The medical staff meeting was by far more productive, this time led by the program director. Previously I was told to schedule a meeting with a geneticist to consider all possible causes for Oskar's behavior and given a name to call. Once again, George the intern with his lack of real world skills, gave me the geneticists direct number instead of the appointment desk. I explained to him it would make more sense if he a.) called the geneticist directly, did a little mono y mono with her to squeeze us in for an appointment since she doesn't know us from boo and could give a rip about Oskar's dna or b.) give me the number to the appointment desk and a script of what to ask for so we could get our foot in the door. George looked at me with his blank stare. I then suggested he have the program director call the geneticist directly since they are colleagues. All of a sudden the lights came on and George gave his boss a call. I think he finds me exhausting.

The program director leading our meeting informed me she had a call into the geneticist because 'they were colleagues' (really?) and is going to see if she can get her to squeeze us in ASAP to take advantage of our time here. She also explained they have ruled out Fragile X syndrome and while Oskar intellectually and behaviorally does not fit the profile for FAS, they are still continuing down that path because he has some facial features. I have since learned they received a grant to conduct a HUGE FAS study, so with this being their baby, they aren't quick to let it go. Your tax dollar hard at work.

I have, however, let it go. I'm not sure what facial features they are looking for but if you take a baby picture of Oskar and compare it to a baby picture of Reggie, they are interchangeable. Oskar has looked at photos of his Daddy and said, "that's Oskar, that's me!" So, now, I guess, you have been officially insulted as well, Mary, for passing on FAS 'looking' genes. I had no idea kids with FAS were so attractive! From an appearance standpoint, seems like not such a bad thing.

Tuesday leads me to a mom playdate with my new crew of bad-ass broads. We go for a mani-pedi, then lunch. I love the synergy here! With these women coming here from all over the US, they each have new and different ideas to share and the exchange of information is endless. Have you tried this? No? What about this? Yes! And then layer that with this! If anything, this trip was worth it just for networking. We feverishly grab our smartphones and start pulling up websites. One gal's on her i-phone searching for a park with an adapted playscape that ends up being within the park by our apartment. Today is a day I heart technology!

Oskar continues to do well on the medication he was prescribed. We're all amazed at how effective it is at a such a small dose but not complaining either. He is in such a better state of control with his emotions and reactions. No longer a coiled rattle snake, you can tell Oskar is comfortable in his relaxed world. We went to the park (my fellow mom found on her i-phone) and he played with another boy for at least half an hour with the boy telling him what to do and Oskar joyfully doing it! I'm not sure what this boy's background was but he was a born teacher; patient, succinct with his explanations, and quick to praise. He was a beautiful combination of maturity and playfulness as he softly gave instruction to carefully build their sand castles then together, smashed them to smithereens while they both laughed out loud. When the boy had to go, Oskar said, 'good-bye!' (one time!) instead of his usual perseveration of, 'where are you going? why?' One small step for Oskar, one giant leap for his socialization.

The next day we went to the La Brea Tar Pits. The last time I was there was when I was 12ish with my cousin, aunt, and uncle. I remembered it being so much bigger (go figure) but the smell didn't disappoint. That was right on. We go there at 4:10 and while the tar pits are public property open 24/7, the museum closes at 5. The ticket guy, my new CA BGF (sorry, Chris) worked us a smokin' deal and thankfully asked if we parked on Wilshire. We did and he gave me the 411, girlfriend, that I better move my car or it will be ticketed and towed, toot sweet! Since it took us 45 minutes to go 5 miles down Wilshire, Oskar was not thrilled with the detour and started to inform me and the museum of his displeasure. Once again my BGF saved the day by sternly but calmly telling Oskar he needed to listen to his momma or we'd be camping on the museum lawn. Oskar responded favorably and raced me to our unticked Volvo so I could move it to safer pastures. Now it's 4:30 and we blow through the museum at Oskar speed ending in the gift store buying an old skool water weinie, this one filled, appropriately, with dinosaurs.

That evening, I was on the phone late so went to bed after midnight - pumpkin time, as my mom would say! I was just settling into bed when I shot up to the deafening sound of a sliding door being forced open. Thinking it was mine, I grabbed my cell phone and dialed 9-1-1. I desparetly tried to remember our address, building name, longitute and latitute, any geographic indicator I could provide to the operator as she dispatched an officer. Now fully freaking out, my heart is tap dancing into my throat. I debate leaving the bedroom to investigate the noise I think came from the living room recognizing, I have no means for defense. Sucking it up, I go into stealth mode, slink into the living room to find my sliding glass door secured and undisturbed. The panic washes away replaced by embarrassment as I explain to my supportive operator the false alarm. It was the neighbors upstairs. Each apartment deck faces an enclosed courtyard so all voices and sounds reverberate in this mini-ampitheater distorting their direction. Thinking rationally, Spiderman would be the only likely intruder - we're on the 2nd floor. I did end up picking up some pepper spray per the advice of my former big-city friend, Nancy. Better to be safe than stuck in a spidey web.